I am scared
Not for the first time
But for the first time the fear looks so real

It pushed me to be courageous enough
To accept that I am scared
To put it on paper
For the record
That I am scared

Scared of a lonely old age
Scared of having no one on whom I will have a right
Scared of not having any child ever to put to sleep
Scared of all my affection remaining locked away like a lost treasure in a crimson box of my heart
Drowned under oceans of loneliness
Lost through broken anchors of promises
Under the debris of broken dreams of togetherness
The shadows of the silence of hypocrites
The greys of the indecisive cold feeted claimers of love, who can't tell between two women through their faces or souls
Who respect one woman who created them but forgot to teach them that other women deserve the same respect, commitment and dedication

The heart that doesn't bleed anymore from stabs as it is drained long back